🐶 Why Does My Dog Not Listen to Me? 6 Real Reasons and What to Do About It

Hazel Johnson Author

Nov 02, 2025 |

Understand why your dog doesn’t listen - distraction, fear, confusion or stress - and how to rebuild focus through calm joyful training.

Why Does My Dog Not Listen to Me? 6 Real Reasons and What to Do About It

Why “not listening” is rarely about stubbornness

If you’ve ever stood in the garden calling your dog while they joyfully pretend you don’t exist, you’ll know just how maddening it can feel, especially when they seem to listen perfectly well for someone else.

Here’s the thing: dogs aren’t being defiant or testing boundaries. When they “don’t listen,” it’s their way of telling us that they’re distracted, unsure, or simply struggling to focus in that moment.

Once we understand why, we can help them tune back in with kindness and confidence.

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🐾 6 Real Reasons Your Dog Might Not Be Listening

Sometimes we think our dogs are ignoring us, when in reality, they’re just doing their best in a world full of noise and smells. 

Here are six of the most common reasons focus fades:

1️⃣ They’re distracted – the world’s more interesting than you right now.
2️⃣ They’re afraid – of a situation (e.g., another dog), a sound (e.g., a vehicle passing), or being told off (e.g., if they've refused to come back to you when called in the past).
3️⃣ They’re confused – too many cues or unclear messages.
4️⃣ They’re over-aroused or overtired – dogs can’t think clearly when they're stressed or tired.
5️⃣ They’re experiencing pain or hearing loss – especially in older dogs.
6️⃣ The relationship bank account is low – listening doesn’t feel rewarding yet, or their name has been overused and it just becomes white noise.

Each of these reasons shows up a little differently depending on the situation.  Sometimes it’s who’s giving the cue, sometimes where or when it happens.

Let’s look at some of the most common scenarios dog owners ask about (you may even spot your own in here!) and unpack what’s really going on beneath the surface, and what they tell us about your dog’s mindset.

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Why Does My Dog Not Listen to Me But Listens to Others?

It’s rarely about authority; it’s about consistency and predictability.
Dogs feel safest and most responsive when they know exactly what will happen next.

If someone else is calmer, uses fewer words, or rewards more reliably, that’s who the dog will naturally tune into. It’s not favouritism; it’s predictability.

🪄 Try this: start building that trust bank again with short, playful interactions. Games like Find It turn “listening” into something joyful, so your dog learns that tuning in to you always leads to good things.

Sometimes it’s not even about who your dog listens to, but how each person communicates. I often get asked...

Why Does My Dog Not Listen to Me But Listens to My Partner?

In this case, it can simply be about tone and timing.
If your partner gives fewer cues, waits patiently, and rewards quickly, your dog receives a clearer message.

Try mirroring that calm confidence. Speak less, pause more, and notice how quickly your dog begins to re-engage.

Tone and timing play a huge part in communication, but so does the environment. Let’s see what happens when extra people or distractions enter the picture.

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When Your Dog Stops Listening Around Other People

Distraction plays a huge part. Extra voices, movement, and smells can overload your dog’s senses — especially at social events or gatherings. Their focus isn’t gone; it’s just scattered.

Keep practice sessions short and simple, and start in quiet spaces. Add distractions gradually, rewarding every small success. Calm, fun repetition beats correction every time.

Of course, not every listening lapse is about excitement or distraction. Sometimes, the change feels sudden, almost overnight and that can have very different causes!

When Your Dog Suddenly Stops Listening

A sudden change is often a sign that something deeper is happening.
Common causes include:

• Pain or hearing changes (especially in older dogs)
• Stress or fear after a recent exciting or upsetting event
• Over-arousal or exhaustion

When changes feel sudden, it’s natural to worry, especially if your dog suddenly ignores recall or seems to switch off completely.

If your once-responsive dog suddenly tunes you out, check for physical issues first. Then go back to basics: rebuild calm through rest, routine, and gentle games that lower stress. 

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Why Dogs Don’t Come When Called

Recall problems are rarely about stubbornness, they’re about emotion.

If “come here” has ever ended in the bath, a scolding, or the end of playtime, your dog might now associate it with something negative.

👉 Make recall predict something amazing every single time: delicious food, play, or praise.
👉 Never call your dog for something unpleasant — quietly go and collect them instead.

Consistency and kindness build a recall your dog wants to respond to.

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My Dog Won’t Listen to Me Outside

The world is bursting with smells, sights, and sounds, and that’s far more interesting than you… unless you make yourself part of the adventure.

Start training focus skills in low-distraction spaces, then gradually move outdoors. Keep early sessions short, rewarding every glance and check-in.

One of my favourite focus games is Find It, which you can play indoors or outside.
Scatter a few treats in the grass, say Find it!, and join the search. It instantly resets attention and builds engagement without pressure.
👉 Watch Jack’s short (indoor) Find It demo here.

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What If Nothing Seems to Work?

If you’ve tried calm, consistent practice and your dog still struggles, don’t lose heart.
Sometimes deep-rooted fear, stress, or medical changes make listening difficult.

That’s where professional help makes all the difference. A behaviour consultant can identify what your dog is feeling and create a personalised plan for progress.

If you’re unsure where to start, reaching out sooner rather than later can make a huge difference.

👉 Get in touch with me if you’d like a personalised plan to help your dog feel calmer and more focused.

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💌 Final Thought

“The best kind of training doesn’t feel like training at all.
It just feels like joy shared between you and your dog.” 💛

Re-connection begins with curiosity, not control.
Play together, celebrate small wins, and watch focus grow naturally.

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Categories: : Over-arousal & Manners